Anthropology, archaeology, sociology, psychology Cardiology, cosmology, cryptology, zoology So many 'ologies about but there’s only one for me I’m obsessed, enthralled, enraptured by the study of flatology Trumping, blowing, tooting Wind passing day and night Ripeness abounds with interesting sounds Measured by ears and nose but not sight The Latin term is flatus But no … Continue reading Fluent


A monster was sighted in Sidmouth Sixty-four metres wide Longer than a commercial plane Too big for the sewer to hide In the depths of the drainage system Its bulk caused a blockage that backed up the pipes Yet the monster continued to grow in size Because people kept flushing their wipes And pouring oil … Continue reading Fatberg


A pheasant burst from the bushes Screeching its colourful cry Fingernails on blackboard boards Ungainly skip to the sky Pheasants are birds for certain But must have been at the back of the queue When flying skills were meted out Panicked bobbing, gait askew Yet they must have been at the front For their feathers … Continue reading Pheasant


If celery were salary perhaps we’d all live healthily but money’s bought and money’s sold no longer backed by the price of gold the salt of the earth if you work hard enough not worth your salt if the getting gets tough in times of Rome it was salt you see whose ownership would set … Continue reading Salary

Bake Off

Four and twenty blackbirds were baked into a pie But one escaped this wicked fate and soared into the sky Felt freedom touch her wingtips in the rushing of the air Four and twenty heartaches tinged her lightness with despair Time passed by and she became exhausted by her grief Made a resolute decision to … Continue reading Bake Off