Quiche Wars

Forget coronation chicken, now it's coronation quiche
Spinach, eggs and cheese, it all sounds rather niche
But there's beef about the pastry, the French say it's just a tart
They're miffed about the tarragon, to them we've ruined art
The brotherhood of quiche Lorraine is up in arms in France
Our coronation quiche has gone and twisted up their pants!
And veggies shouldn't bother, for the dish is filled with lard
Justifying pig fat - even with broad beans - is hard
But enough of war, it's party time, let's start a peaceful campaign
Let them eat quiche! I declare, washed down with English champagne
Photo by Paulo Scalfoni on Pexels.com

It’s coronation time in the U.K this weekend, roll out the bunting and pray for sunshine for all those street parties. For my esteemed American readers, this poem will only work if niche is pronounced neesh, not nich. Can someone please tell me if quiche is pronounced quich in the United States?

This poem was inspired by a fabulously hilarious guardian article about a furore over the official coronation dish, which is possibly a quiche Lorraine and possibly a tart. I must admit I didn’t even know coronation chicken was so-called because it was once the dish of our Queen’s coronation, I just thought it was curried chicken that fancied itself a bit special. I learn something new every day. Oh, and of course I know there’s no such thing as English champagne, it’s just sparkling wine that taste exactly like champagne.

12 thoughts on “Quiche Wars

  1. Brilliant, Rae! Really fun, funny and clever! I’m half American (grew up there) and half British (English mum/American dad). In America we pronounce it “keesh” so the rhyme works beautifully. Also, my British half read “neesh” so it flowed along like a song for me. Also I loved learning that coronation chicken was the dish for the coronation of our beloved Queen Elizabeth, whom I am still grieving.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Melanie & thanks for clearing that up for me!

      We ate coronation chicken flavour crisps last night in memory of the Queen.

      I’m curious, do you still use American words for things since you grew up there (like sidewalk & elevator) or do you use British terminology now?

      My son enjoys lots of American you tuber’s and now sometimes uses yard instead of garden & diaper instead of nappy!


      • I never cease to be amazed at the weird and wide variety of crisp flavors here!
        As for terminology… it’s a mish mash and I never know what might come outta my mouth.🤣 I try to “ do as the Romans do” depending on which side of the pond I’m on but it’s very random. I do say garden and bins and chuffed and posh and lift but I cannot bring myself to call a sandwich a butty or a pacifier a dummy. I also say garbage not rubbish. I adore how Brits add “ie” to everything and enjoy saying pressies, mozzies, walkies, willies, wellies and smellies. 🤣 When in England I call zucchinis corgettes and eggplants aubergines but I revert back in the US cause no one would know what I was talking about.
        I like the word claggy as there is no equiv in the US. I also forget that the US term for a bum bag is a rude word in the UK and usually blurt it out. 😂Likewise I get the peace sign turned around the wrong way sometimes. I’ve learned what a tip is and what fly-tipping is (the strangest term ever), and I use queue about as often as I use line. I love telling my partner he’s faffing about but I think trumping for farting is way too hilarious. I could go on but suffice it to say, language is a never-ending source of amusement and fun! Thanks for asking!

        Liked by 1 person

      • I love this Melanie, everything about this tickled me…there’s so much I hadn’t thought it (fanny pack 🤣)
        I love that you’ve adopted some colloquialisms & stayed true to your roots in others.
        I hadn’t given much thought to how odd the word claggy is!

        Fly-tipping is an odd one, I don’t know about that either!
        Trumping is a fantastic word! Do they have ‘pull me finger’ in the states? 🙊

        I’d never noticed before how we change everything with ‘ies’ 🤣🙈

        I challenge you to use the word courgette in the states 😉

        I really think you should write an article or blog post on this, it’s highly entertaining!


  2. Hilarious Guardian article: “It was … Rough. Soggy, pale pastry. Loose, wet filling.”

    Why am I thinking that’s perfect, and so beautifully fitting, for a street party on a May bank holiday to celebrate the coronation of Charles III? “


    Liked by 1 person

  3. This is funny. I’m not huge into quiche but wondered about the choice of it in England. It does seem like a way to provoke the French. Still, give me some bubbly [call it what you will] and I’d enjoy the coronation quiche.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Yes, we do say “Pull my Finger” in the US🤣
    Ask your son if he knows the US equivalent to faffing about. (Answer: dinking around)
    Probably going back to Alaska later this summer so I’ll try courgette on my clan back there. That will put them out of flunter (another great English expression). I’ve actually thought about writing a poem about all these fun differences so thanks for the nudge!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yay for the internationality of pull me finger! 😆

      I’ve never heard of ‘out of flunter’ so that knocked me off kilter, but I like it!

      Definitely write that poem, it’ll be hilarious 😊


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